the Magic of Spirit

Rose LoPiccolo : 6/24/1908 - 2/18/2008

grandma died last week. she would've been 100 yr old june 24, 2008. i just returned from several days in brooklyn, ny for her wake and funeral. everyone said grandma looked beautiful. i guess she did, as far as one can expect a dead person's body to look. but she just didn't look like herself to me. of course, you say, one does not, can not truly look like themselves once dead. but i think that some people do and just look like they're sleeping. people seemed genuine in saying she looked beautiful. not just that they were saying it to be kind. i don't know. i think that once the spirit leaves the body that it borrowed to be here in this life, that body can't possibly look like it once did, because the spirit gives it so much more than just life. it's kind of like that saying "the whole is greater than the sum of its parts"... once the spirit is released from within it's physical form, the person that you once knew is no longer there. there is magic within spirit. and when i think of it that way, i don't get as sad because i believe that her spirit lives on in another form, another place. i honor her body. but looking at it doesn't make me think i'm looking at her. if that makes sense at all??

just the very morning that my grandma died, her nurse told me that she (the nurse) started singing to grandma one of the songs grandma used to always sing and that grandma immediately started to shake her shoulders back and forth dancing. i kept looking at her shoulders picturing her delight that morning when she was dancing, doing what must have become a reflexive reaction by now to hearing music she knew and loved. i want to see her spirit dance again. i asked her to visit me in my dreams, because i happen to dream a lot so why not ask right? i'm hoping that she will. my grandpa does and i love every visit. one thing about my grandma is that she was like no other. so i expect that won't change just because she's moved on.

it brings me joy to think about meeting her again some how and in some way yet unknown. and those of you who know me know that i love the unknown. there is so much potential and hope in it. it doesn't take away all of the pain of missing her company, but it helps. i know a shift has taken place in me because i can more easily move to this place of peace and away from the sadness. and that is comforting, too.