Standing on Solid Ground

Well, what a weekend. My first full weekend in a long time without restlessness, staying connected to myself and my mind not in overdrive. It was very full but had the promise of some very wonderful moments. Yesterday I awoke and went to the gym for my favorite class Pump and Pedal. When I got there to my surprise my regular teacher wasn't there and I immediately became uncomfortable and disappointed. The "new lady" said, "well, today's class will be a little different but still challenging. Will do a full hour of just spinning". To which I promptly replied much to my dismay " I HATE SPINNING AND I HATE YOU!!!!" Everyone including myself was aghast. After the shock of it I proceeded to pull a bike onto the floor and start cycling. It turn out she was a good teacher and even had some Stevie Wonder tracks in her music repertoire. So I left the gym and headed over to my clients house to bring her an invoice for work I did this last Friday. When I knocked on the glass window pane at the front door, I looked and saw they were having breakfast. I started to leave but Espie (my client) came out and hugged me and then said " would you like some breakfast?", "Oh no, I couldn't" "Please please come in we are having pork carnitas" Well who am I to turn down pork carnitas right after working out? It was as if God himself looked down upon me and granted me a wish without my asking. So clearly you know the rest of the story, I sat in a room of almost complete strangers that spoke almost no English, eating pork, listening to Mariachi and lovin every minute of it!

By the time I got home it was 3 O'clock and my performance for the Vagina Monologues was in 2.5 hours. Time to buckle down I thought. I set up the mirror in my little studio and read the piece twice, jumped in the shower and headed off to get Kim. We headed down to Morry's all the while, so distraught as to why in the world we had committed to doing this. I mean what the hell was I thinking agreeing to talk about my vulva in front of 50 people during the most challenging mental health month of my life??? I wore my new red dress that I got at Ross and black pants. The backroom at Morry's was all a bustle with people and suddenly it became very clear to me "I need a drink". But alas I decided to wait so as to not fall and trip in a drunken stupor as I went running from the room when they introduced me. It was all quite hysterical, literally, 7 women that barely knew each other get together and read the words of other women that barely know each other talking about their vagina's. Oh and as I start to scan the room, I notice two Cal Stat Professors sitting smack in the full frontal view of the performance area. Two lesbian Cal State Professors mind you. This almost sends me over the edge. Finally a friendly face Steve and his girlfriend arrive and I distract myself with them. Then in walks a handsome man all in black with two bouquets of flowers. Yes, it was. The Long Hair. Bringing his lady flowers. He had a gig and wasn't able to see my performance but came for a few minutes before heading out.
Finally after what seems like hours, the performance begins. It's all well and good until number 5 goes to the mike and I am number 6. I'm not sure what was wetter my hands or the pages I was holding and supposed to read from. SO they announce my name and much to my surprise people start clapping and calling out my name. I'm humbled. I go to the mike and with a quaky, achy, teeny voice say my first line. "I have always been obsessed with naming things". OK, I think here I am, this is OK, there is no turning back now. Suddenly,I lower the pages and I'm in character. I've crossed over and out of my mouth comes the words and I'm entranced. I proceed to share a story with my friends in a living room about disc covering my vulva. And guess what? They loved it and so did I.